On restoring our faith in ourselves

You can tell the real boy a mile off by what he gravitates toward never mind tries out for real  such as playing soldiers even as here using a real weapon in controlled safe environment such as at this Armed Forces day event.

Never mind those who'd be outraged by the very idea of introducing a boy to weapons and enjoying doing so.

This week we learned that in 2018 the Royal Mint's panel turned down the suggestion of making a Commemorative Fifty Pence Piece to mark fifty years of the death of the highly popular author Enid Blyton because they believed she was racist, homophobic and sexist.

That was news to me as I've never seen anything remotely homophobic in the many books I have of hers usually in older editions and while the odd character might of said something that today might be seen as sexist that was little different from the world itself we lived in.

When it comes to the charge of Racism there is little stereotypical black as feeble-minded, mischievous or lesser character roles as any other and Gollywogs or Gollies as we called were as much the goodies as not.

The Golly was never seen as a representation of actual black people within British Society and never by boys such as  me who owned and played with gollywogs who often were the first to stand up against actual racism in the playground and dining hall.

That whole 'issue' really stems from the importation of American norms where 'blacked up' mimetic submissive characters did exist and then taking a  very American centric view at black history and racism. 

Our Gollies' as featured on Robinson's Jam didn't 'Jive talk' or speak in croele. They spoke and used 'standard english'.

No Boy (or girl for that matter) was harmed by what she wrote which were gripping adventures and short stories that reflected the world in which they had been written, typically the late nineteen-thirties to early nineteen-sixties where immigration while existing wasn't as widespread so it would of been rare to have seen anyone who wasn't white British.

To the extent you could say she did see the role of then Empire as lead by Whites, well few would argue against allowing people to rule themselves but the jury is very much out if they are any better run for that today and many felt things were better all round for it.

More to the point I feel actually today's young would benefit from being able to read stories where boys really are boys strong, leading and also caring and girls can lead but are able show more of their inner feminine side with nothing to prove free from adult agendas around gender roles and signal virtueing.

Boys and girls under ten do not want to read about alternate gender and sexual identities because they're read very much for relaxation for fun that also help build up word knowledge.

All boys and girls want to do is read stories about their world that can take hold in their own imaginations and only later on look more into what they personally believe about themselves and the wider world.

The trouble with the Liberal Marxist approach is it just denies the reality of what you yourself feel and love to do, read and enjoy for a half baked ideological orthodoxy which itself will be condemned in the next twenty or so years.

The past is best looked at from the standards of its own day, lessons perhaps being drawn from not fed into a 'memory hole' to be erased for not fitting an approved viewpoint of today.
We must stand up for ourselves and what we believe to be right.

Older boys as key to raising younger peers

Something I do think isn't talked about is how older boys can teach others how to behave appropriately by giving them some responsibility over younger boys which may be the granting of say Dinner Monitor status to ensure plates are returned and scraped off properly, captaincy of a team or being a Prefect or Head Boy responsible for a group of boys.

I feel that leads to both the development of personal responsibility and real leadership, learning to step in on the outset and deal with things rather than waiting for someone else

Yes it may mean punishing the person although it need not be physical even if metaphorically speaking giving him a whipping is what he needed when he posed a danger to everyone.

I was given some memorable spankings by older boys when I was really out of hand that probably were the more effective for being administered by peers rather than adults as they made me think about my behaviour.

Culture wars on Tumblr

Sometimes between what might be a planned post, something unexpected happens  that changes matters.
I do blog about Scouting for personal reasons and on Tumblr had followed a number of blogs connected with it but had noticed a number seemed to be disappearing.

One I loved by by a user who went under the username Redneckerchief who as far as I was aware was an American who blog about youth movements around the world both from the past and the present day.
He looked at some people like me had political and moral issues without political endorsement such as The Young Pioneers in what was the Soviet Union connected with the Communist Party and then things such as Scouting such as Boy Scouts of America (B.S.A.), GirlScouting and their British parents the Scout Association and Girlguilding UK, posting about and images of members engaged learning useful skills and building up good knowledge that would help the become useful, reliable young people, an asset to their communities.

The username came from the fact all these groups used the neckerchief as a symbol of belonging and all of his posts and comments were very much safe for work, respectful of the young people themselves and not in violation of Tumblr's terms and conditions.
Thus it was a surprise to me to see his account wiped out on Friday when I went to  back up my Scouting Tumblr to blogger which sadly is a must given the arbitrary nature of these things.
The sad thing is they take little action against people who hold despicable material such as child pr0n and yet blogs that are about childhood and often positive about things like boys education, traditional school dress and scouting just get axed.
There are times when I wonder if that sites ultra liberal bias such as summing everyone is a social justice activist fighting for 76 genders, putting gay and transgendered, people on pedestal where being so trumps anything else they do (or have done) supporting extreme climate change demonstrators while allowing anti male posts and memes to be posted has something to do with it.
Are things associated more with traditional social models and gender roles something Tumblr and the Liberals want shut down or at least neutered to comply with the second wave of feminism with its issues with men and stay at home Mums?

Careful!

The pouty look personified for  boy who may of had a bad day or is just fed up of being messed about by the grown ups which I can easily understand as you're sat waiting to let in with your case.
I rather suspect if he was anything like myself he's going to end up with at least the threat of a spanking for it if he doesn't stop on a count of three seconds as it isn't looking good.

Getting it together

Being away got me thinking about something in very much clear cut ways and that's what I'm devoting column space to this week.

One thing that always pissed me off from boyhood was write large in the signage and that was there were three categories of children and even adults, boys, girls and 'disabled' OR later on mens, women's and 'disabled'.

To put it bluntly, the presumption seemed to be that the minute a person had a disability, you also lost your sense of gender identity too as if you acquired a second disability straightaway that while notionally gender neutral in reality was far more feminine like assuming your clothes fastened the same as girls did are your interests were.

You'd struggle to find a Man who'd handle you when it comes dressing, treating you as one of the boys and engaging in male talk with you.

Worst still, even your toilet needs were regarded as female so you never went to the same toilets as boys did, you were always dealt with by females, never men and you had to sit down to go.

I always wanted to piss with the other boys  even if it meant being parked up in the urinals pissing into a bottle, emptying at the urinal and washing my hands in front of every other boy who was pissing too.

That's why I love that sign- it gets it right, disabled boys ARE boys and really facilities like a larger disabled toilet should be in your own genders spaces that you enter like any other boy.

The other thing connected with all of that is how all that plus meddling by various people left me in sense of gender otherness, a malaise when really going back and looking at my more formative years it was more obvious that odd gender untypical interest aside I was very much a boy and happy with and being pushed along other directions had not really done anything for me. 

Quite the opposite actually.

Working from the time I was at asb.org to sorting out old tumblr account to even sorting out an even older music forum account  and just coming out openly as a boy and masculine progress is being made like coming out with the short form of my first name.

That malaise had added own issues like not feeling I could like my own body when you'd been pushed into thinking it wasn't really you.

Well where I was it was a bit hot plus we'd been playing physical games afterward that took my mind a bit to school games and swimming where you'd shower afterwards and in truth I was a bit sweaty.
After all most boys do sweat more by design compared with girls.

After spending a long time disassociating from my body by hiding in a bubble filled bath, decided to take a shower which I wasn't sure over not least for forgetting completely how to use one managed to get it going .

I started to apply the shower gel all over me, torso, legs and intimate parts and then as I looked in the left hand mirror directed the water spray over me as I rubbed into in cleaning myself. 

I made myself look at my body as I worked on my intimate areas rather than averting my eyes realizing I loved my boyish genitalia and it was nothing to feel ashamed over.

I Love what makes me my gender and all it means.

Embracing that and loving myself means no more hiding my gender from anyone and that my sex organs are at core of me.They are me.

Another thing is over the years I have moved much further back in part through the regressive side of me as well as the side dealing all that other mess toward more overtly boyish dress.

It was very obvious during the period I was away, really that is what I feel most comfortable with, it is my second skin as it were not things that made me feel bad about who I really was so anything like that will be going for good from my life.

I feel outside of uniform traditional boys sports shorts and tops is much more in tune with the spirit of what is in me.

I also know I'm a hetrosexual male and this is a good thing so I will stand up for my own sexuality in a sea where only gay or non sexual sexual identities are preferred.