Time to act?

While my head is a bit messed up with some triggering incident caused by stuff on one site we won't go deeply into, discussion is continuing on the topic of under sixteens and social media following a ban on it in Australia and talk of similar schemes elsewhere.

Part of the problem was the internet and especially the social media part were never really designed for young users who in the past might of had to got permission to publish a school magazine and the content would of been moderated prior to it being published could now put anything up with the companies only responding to reports if anyone raised concerns.

And that's too late if slurs, insults, dubious pictures and the like are being posted and traded around as then schools are having to deal with the fall out in school time beyond the issues around just how long younsgters are staring at relatively small screens.

Reports are coming from health professionals about the major rise in eyesight issues and premature, often highly inappropriate sexual behaviour by youngsters copying pr0n they've seen or challenges that are often highly dangerous, even life threatening.

Something has to change here as even as legal adults we can have issues around addiction as the algorithms just keep on finding more and more material to scroll though.

We are now talking serious around a social media ban - not a absolute ban on internet access although a good case can be made for the youngest only doing so under supervision and it is about time.

 

Coping with "No signal"

Another week and I might add one that one would sooner be gone with given the issues with the internet I will publish on what was intended for a blog on Monday at some point so in the wait I've I have been reading apart from the severe minus seven degrees with a goodly amount of snow.

Having both my Dandy annual in its modern format and the "Classic" Beano and Dandy themed collection proved handy as I could read stories at leisure plus obviously last weeks Beano and Pheonix.

I did get around to listening to some records that had arrived although I hadn't any indication of when they were coming as at least physical media isn't affected by internet outage.

I'm sort of back up running but only with what is best described as a router with a 4g mobile internet signal that proved a pig to set up the blue led you needed to see if it was working itself wasn't and this on EE loan stock sent out as the installation on Friday just did not work because necessary work wasn't done to switch the full fibre signal over.

It is to hoped by the weekend the actual internet and landline phone connection will be restored OR ELSE! 

Online becomes off

Here we go after a rough few days, catching up and all of that.

Last week saw an announcement I was rather pleased to read about that covers part of this district which I feel matters and that is concerning the use, some might say misuse, of the Smartphone  by boys and girls at school and beyond.

The first thing was once social media site decided to have special rules and settings for those sixteen and under that include settings only a parent can adjust by default to limit what can be seen  and ensure parents who often are the ones buying the phone and it's mobile connection are aware of what they're up to.

As we weren't allowed in Adult Magazine and Sex shops at fourteen and often our folks were told if we'd been seen up to no good I agree totally even if more could be done.

It's a start.

The other is some local Academy Schools are are on the list to ban phone from being used in school grounds beyond a very narrow exemption list such was where such a phone is used to monitor Blood Sugar levels for a diabetic.

They will be handed in on arrival given some children may need them in the Phonebox free era we are in if they become unwell or need to contact home or school urgently and handed back at the end of school.

That should stop the continous low level distruption in the classroom from phones "going off", sharing content, attempting to film teachers, fellow pupils and the 50+ alerts the modern childs during school time.

Just imagine it a recess where you have to talk or play rather than doing the socially isolated zombie thing staring into the phone not actually getting a break from work!

Where schools have tried this it has transformed things for the good although like any addiction (and sadly it IS) the "cold turkey" period can be bit rough .

As much as I'd of loved to had had the internet at high school for keeping in touch and researching things I'm glad I didn't feel obliged to spend every other minute at home and at school focussed on social media  just having a kick about or playing Chess at the club Andy and I run instead.

Triggered and trying to pick up the pieces.

The week was due to end on something on high and anyone that read the post on Friday  on the other blog may well of been forgiven for thinking that  as I looked at how over the years I had actually developed and as a result of that the blog had reflected those changes in me.

Some of those things included people who were going to have a more parental input in my life to help me better manage it because I was struggling with it providing guidance.

 It's perfectly true to say emotionally and psychologically, many of us carry some baggage around with although for most it's something they have control over but for some of us it goes much deeper than that.

You might think you have it safely contained where it doesn't cause you any problems however this sort of traumatic events can jolt you back back very much in that moment reliving those raw terrifying emotions, freezing you, leaving you shaking badly.

For me personally I do go 'mute' in stressful situations, I stare out oblivious to what is going on around, I just shut down and curl up. It's a vulnerability I have to live with when I'm so overwhelmed I can't act to look after myself.

That's what makes a triggering episode like the one I had on Thursday really bad bring back painful memories of witnessing verbal abuse and physical violence at home and of inappropriate physical contact outside of it. It goes that much deeper than just something you'd rather never happened.

I supposed in a way it had to happen at a site very much for adults because with my mixture of learning/developmental disabilities I don't really slot into sites well because I do need generally a higher degree of moderation and 'hand holding' than most sites expressly for adults offer but either that sites that do are strictly under 18 or more general ones where some topics would (understandably)  be off limits.

What I need more - an more older kid style of site -  but for over 18's doesn't exist.

It just happened that in innocuously questioning a part of the main site entrance,  it opened up discussion things that directly triggered emotions from those experiences that left me shaking in my tummy  just even typing it.

I just feel at the moment typing this I need  to try to get this under some control and a part of that is to take a break from the site in question until I feel ready to log back in seeing posts without all these memories flooding back.

I think the whole topic that lead to this needs to resolved, "put to bed" so the thread and everything in it can just float away or be closed off.

For me at some point when I feeling better than I am presently, I would like to work toward some permanent closure  with the individuals concerned and  not just from a personal point of view  that's obviously a very important for me but also for them to try to work through their feelings on what happened and how it's left things.

To me it is that within my limitations, I do need when I'm better to resolve all of this in a mature way rather than just avoiding people who I did really like and mostly likely never saw where things would end up.

The M.I.A. Edition

Hello again! 

There we were in the throws of celebrating the second anniversary of my Tumblr, and how that had lead to processes that had restored both my vigor and a clear cut identity as just a boy with his own personality as Tumblr decided to give me a spanking and remove the account it was on and two others.

I think the most important thing for us to realize is as much we enjoy social media and websites, people or even the sites themselves are always in state of flux and the relationships that really  matter with them or those that went to personal ones through emailing or face to face encounters and that we can't restore things to how they were.

Sites do go over time - I can think of five of the top of head I belong to between 2005 and 2009 that are no longer with us such as my beloved Friends Reunited - that we may miss but they are either replaced as a good few have for all intrusive social media or that we replace by with real life activities such as munches or play meets.

That blog, The Traditional Schoolboy lives on as indeed I do in real life on Wordpress where I will be writing a entry per day in the same style as the Tumblr but with some additional text to match the back ups that I had made since November of 2018.

I have established a new Tumblr but rather than posting all the content there I will use it to promote the Wordpress continuation of TSB as the one lesson that I need to learn from this 'spanking' is they can just pull several thousand posts an two years posts with no way of just importing and resuming.

Sometimes the best response we can make to such situations is to simply move on.

Social media week

This week I decided to talk a bit more interaction on sites and social media

This week has been a bit odd to say the least with the MLP Club blocking my 100% SFW Cglre age regression blog's account for no apparent reason other than reblogging an Agere Toy Sharing scheme's info which is odd as high proportion of people looking at pre year 2000 toys and pastimes will surely include people who do age regress which will include memories of such things.

In the real order of things well away from the make believe word of Tumblr the Music blog suitable regendered has turned 500 posts well officially at least as it had been going for a long time April 2006 and I'm sure I actually posted a good number more than that.
Unlike a character like Grant there, I don't live for post counts as I don't feel the need for adoration and the like although the recent software like many today does issue various trophies like that 500th post one.

I'm just relearning how to interact as male, picking topics outside the main music stuff to join in with like Model Railways and soccer as I work through the malaise and out as the boy and male I am, happy to be seen as such. 

Triggered and trying to pick up the pieces

The week was due to end on something on high and anyone that read the post on Friday  on the other blog may well of been forgiven for thinking that  as I looked at how over the years I had actually developed and as a result of that the blog had reflected those changes in me.

Some of those things included people who were going to have a more parental input in my life to help me better manage it because I was struggling with it providing guidance and oversight and also by consent, spanking me which has worked well.

It's perfectly true to say emotionally and psychologically, many of us carry some baggage around with although for most it's something they have control over but for some of us it goes much deeper than that.

You might think you have it safely contained where it doesn't cause you any problems however this sort of traumatic events can jolt you back back very much in that moment reliving those raw terrifying emotions, freezing you, leaving you shaking badly.

For me personally I do go 'mute' in stressful situations, I stare out oblivious to what is going on around, I just shut down and curl up. It's a vulnerability I have to live with when I'm so overwhelmed I can't act to look after myself.

That's what makes a triggering episode like the one I had on Thursday really bad bring back painful memories of witnessing verbal abuse and physical violence at home and of inappropriate physical contact outside of it. It goes that much deeper than just something you'd rather never happened.

I supposed in a way it had to happen at a site very much for adults because with my mixture of learning/developmental disabilities I don't really slot into sites well because I do need generally a higher degree of moderation and 'hand holding' than most sites expressly for adults offer but either that sites that do are strictly under 18 or more general ones where some topics would (understandably)  be off limits.What I need more - an more older kid style of site -  but for over 18's doesn't exist.

It just happened that in innocuously questioning a part of the main site entrance,  it opened up discussion things that directly triggered emotions from those experiences that left me shaking in my tummy  just even typing it.

I just feel at the moment typing this I need  to try to get this under some control and a part of that is to take a break from the site in question until I feel ready to log back in seeing posts without all these memories flooding back.

I think the whole topic that lead to this needs to resolved, "put to bed" so the thread and everything in it can just float away or be closed off.

For me at some point when I feeling better than I am presently, I would like to work toward some permanent closure  with the individuals concerned and  not just from a personal point of view  that's obviously a very important for me but also for them to try to work through their feelings on what happened and how it's left things.

To me it is that within my limitations, I do need when I'm better to resolve all of this in a mature way rather than just avoiding people who I did really like and mostly likely never saw where things would end up.