Getting it straight

The week here so far hasn't been particular stressful just writing my blog and reading a few Tumblrs, not that I have as yet as my experiences elsewhere online haven't been good.
One thing I do wish to comment upon is that really there are only boys and girls when it comes to genders not the multitude some seem to put about and that also does NOT include cross-species genders such as fawngender.

You may have a few atypical likes for your gender which is well within the norm but you remain still either a boy or a girl because no amount of fancy titling, hormones or attempts at altering the appearance of your sex organs alters the fact your internal wiring is and remains that of your real gender.

As we grow up we need to learn male skills like how to keep ourselves clean shaven and only males can because they have that personal knowledge and as that young boy along that route we learn it from from older boys and male siblings.

A boy is best brought up as he is - a male

The other thing is that boy has no need for long trousers, boys like me NEED to kept in shorts ideally short ones to help ensure I am handled for my actual emotional and intellectual development as a immature person over the age of 18 who only has the capacity of a child and needs adults to be my responsible grown ups in charge of me.

I'm a Boy

One girl was called Jean Marie

Another little girl was Felicity

Another little girl was Sally Joy

The other was me, and I'm a boy

My name is Bill and I'm a headcase

They practice making up on my face

Yeah, I feel lucky if I get trousers to wear

Spend evenings taking hairpins from my hair

[Chorus]

I'm a boy, I'm a boy

But my ma won't admit it

I'm a boy, I'm a boy

But if I say I am I get it

Put your frock on, Jean Marie

Plait your hair, Felicity

Paint your nails, little Sally Joy

Put this wig on, little Boy

[Chorus]

I wanna play cricket on the green

Ride my bike across the street

Cut myself and see my blood

Wanna come home all covered in mud

While I understand and have worn dresses occasionally in the past, there is a difference between that of denying or as the lyrics of this great song by Who suggesting being forced to be a girl never mind a girlie girl and having your sex denied for their own ends typically a mother that wants only girls.

My gut feelings are very much from the protagonists angle, I just wanna do a lot of boyish things even if there are some feminine things I like doing and I know if I do wear a kilt I know  what I am: A boy who is happy to wear a kilt and NEVER to wear a girls skirt or dress.

In that way I'm all boy.

Raising an issue

Back in the day there was one organization that in effect I wasn't given the chance to join  because of the closed attitudes of my parents that continues to niggle at me and that was I was never afford the chance to join the Scouting movement unlike most of my peers because they didn't think Scouting could provide the assistance I might need although I was getting along in mainstream activities like games and that in Junior school even if boys did fasten my football boot laces for me and that.

Because they didn't think it could lead to a mindset that regarded even asking for as an imposition although I am sure many a cub scout leader of that era would of found a way of doing it informally even say 'buddying up' with another boy rather than paid adult assistants.

The consequences for me were increased isolation socially from the activities of my schoolboy peers, the development of feelings on my part I could never do what regular non-disabled boys could and the lack of direction in channeling my innate boyhood in a useful and maturing way by real mentoring by adult males.

That discounts the practical skills I could of learnt which all added to the deficit of 'life skills' I left school with and very low esteem.

I'd honestly love to have the chance to re do this properly cos while it would be hard for me I think it would do me the world of good.

"This is what you need"

When you aren't as able as most, you are more dependent on other people for things or completing them which isn't just an irritant that can cause you to lash out in frustration in itself but also a cause of tension between you.
What isn't said I think needs to be is inevitably it does alter the relating dynamic by virtue they have what you need and can't do that they can use as lever and equally you may feel you have leverage because they're your means getting something done so it is easy to form an abusive relating pattern.
But it's not just that it's also how that person slots into the role helping you realize the idea you had that can become a point of contention too.
Speaking as a person whose always been disabled, our normal expectation is in discussing it with someone, they work with us to do it the way we wish unless that's not possible in which instance we'd them to talk though other suggestions reaching agreement on the way forward.
What can happen though is the person runs with what they feel is what you need, taking control not just of the help but also of the very idea itself imposing their ideas in place of yours  then threatening to walk off leaving with an uncompleted job if you even question such attitude as the one looking for help.
It's as if at that point you just became invisible no longer permitted to have any say about some things in your lives and that easily leads to tensions that others soon pick up on.
I think if you spot this early on you need to bring this up as it can easily cause issues.