The Traditional Schoolboy Blog End of year review

In the brief history of the The Traditional Schoolboy Blog,  it's the usual thing to reflect a little on the year which externally has been eventful as I emerged after a whole year online with being on Tumblr or more accurately on two Tumblrs as In October I took over one belonging to another user and made it my own.

Part of that my Tumblr was  Group one allowing selected guests to contribute a post and look after it for me while I'm away as I do from time to time and unfortunately Tumblr when you do that tosses away much needed communication tools like asks and messages.

This other blog isn't  just to enable me to interact more with people on Tumblr but it allows me to post some less obvious material than just things connected with school days and scouting.

Blogging had began in 2005 at Friends Reunited but then stopped as that site lost its way and this blog and it's parent The Uniformed Schoolboy last year became it's replacements, picking up from where we'd left off.
The big thing this year was Tumblr, the micro blogging come social media site where bashing the keyboard way here I got established  in April broadcasting to adult little boys and schoolboys quite openly as that boy little, lead to a greater exploration of what I learned was Being a Little and "Age Regression" had come full circle.

It was also a year where increasingly I came out about what is "wrong" with me, why that is and how that plays a very important part in what being me means in everyday life rather than glossing over it or trying to say it doesn't define me where what I actual meant was I shouldn't be  treated less favourably for why I'm me  but  the big elephant in the room no one in authority want to own up to is I can only be me with the needs and issues I have not least being an adult child to whom adult expectations simply cannot be met by passing an equalizing Act here and aspiring to something you can never be there.

The simply and painful truth of the matter is my regression such as it is is the expression of being allowed to function on the basis and understanding of the learning disabled with brain damage child that is living in a body whose chronological age and expectations on the part of the mainstream society is adult instead of very much a child's and are better served by being treated as through I am that child.

Chunks of this are slowly being work through in my relationships with people such as my folks who after trying the equalizing trip beloved of the learned ones who know of things but not had the life, are dealing with me as that learning disabled child, allowing me a choice without confusing me silly with a myriad of options, learning to set the personal limits to that of my actual developmental age where we accept an adult override for me in certain situations so I have a sense of freedom I can use and enjoy that doesn't stress me out nor put me in danger.

I have a caregiver in my life who helps to keep me grounded, helping me with structuring my day which I do struggle with who I can share my junior little life with as their boy loved for being child-like person I am, playing and doing my colouring as well as appropriate disciplining for me as with the learning disabilities, very poor short-term memory and auditory processing disorder, it's isn't that I just may not realize what's wrong with what I'm doing, relying on talking through and trying to reason fails as it gets badly jumbled up leaving me in a bad place mentally.

When I have been with friends too increasingly this year  this whole approach of changing the way and the limits to that more appropriate to that of a junior age child who is looked after by them but encourage to do what a child of that age would for himself and those who look after him as part of a "family" is applied.

Although this blog isn't mainly about it, part of what is my "Age Regression" does include more Junior  style spanking which was a part of how I was brought up as discipline rather than for any more 'adult' angle and 2018 saw more people being prepared to use that with me whenever I'd messed up.

With me this is always just in a regular domestic setting just as it was when I was officially young not taking place in adult clubs nor scened even, just administered in real time as the adults in charge feel I need it as sometimes I need a damn good whacking

A side benefit of this has been I've felt far more 'little'  not just at home but when I've been out with people just letting that side of me out, not feeling I had to pretend to be an adult nor be so stressed out about how I was behaving I was not able to play in a group for not knowing the social rules and being feeling clueless on putting anything right.

Looking forward into 2019, I can see more time spent as that just being me which is always fun to be able to just be regressed me  maybe with others playing providing the help needed in moving me on toward a level of maturity as a forever a child I can achieve.

Having spaces to talk openly without any shame about this aspect to my life is helping me in learning to like myself for the boy I am while helping also with showing my natural empathy with others.

Equally just accepting the one person who seemed to totally misread a situation and then blame me for it was just something they alone had to accept responsibility for on my own website is encouraging me to see other people are responsible for their own situations and that I shouldn't take on responsibilities that aren't truly mine through misplaced guilt. 

Thank you everyone for reading this.